Time to think, Part II

Wow, what an emotional roller-coaster yesterday was. It seems that Amy, mother-to-be of my grandchild, was concerned as she hadn’t felt Elliott kick/move all morning. Sam, father and my step son, phoned Jessie, my wife, and said he’d call her when they got to hospital as they were very worried.

By the time Jessie had returned from work, around 8:30pm, there was still no word. She called their home number, and Amy answered, saying that shortly after Elliott had begun moving and kicking again. She apologised for Sam not calling back and letting us know, but everything was fine. Jessie was relieved, but I also think slightly annoyed at Sam for not phoning her when they knew.

This little episode really got to me. I was so totally unprepared for the kind of feelings I had whilst waiting to find out what was going on and if everything was okay.

I had a good long think about things, and I realised just how much I was looking forward to being a grandad, and more so, what this meant to Amy, Sam and Jessie. How would I help Sam and Amy? How would I support Jessie? How would I react if things went bad? To be honest, I’ve still no idea, but whilst I didn’t know what was going on, I was a complete wreck. I can only hope that, had things gone bad, I’d have found the strength to help Sam, Amy and Jessie.

This ‘scare’ has really brought home to me, just how much my family means to me, and how much I’ve neglected them in pursuit of stupid and sometimes trivial pursuits. So I’ve decided to put more effort, and time, into being with family and enjoying them. This doesn’t mean that my other projects (musically and synth-wise) will be dropped, but it does mean that they will have to take a slightly lower priority than they have to date.

So, I still don’t have my flap-cap and pipe yet, but hopefully Monday or Tuesday I’ll be the proud grandad that I now know, I will be.

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